Duality, the impossible dream?

Duality; The quality or character of being twofold.

We humans are fascinating creatures, and one of the most intriguing things about us (to me) is the polarization we have managed to create within ourselves, in the name of so called sophistication and civility. We love to think of ourselves as the favored species of the gods, that we are meant to be more than all other creatures on the planet. We delude ourselves into believing we are advanced in so many ways.
 We created language primarily as a way to conceal the plain and honest facts in life, to dress them up so that when we inevitably have to face the harsh, simplistic truth in any matter, we can easily talk our way around accepting it and carry on feeling honky dory about our deluded selves.

Most of us warmly nestle ourselves in this clever nest of lies in order to suppress our true, baser selves, our inner primate, the part of us that confirms us to be mere animals.
We are not comfortable with following our instincts and emotions because we are indoctrinated to believe that this is not civilized behavior, that we are above it, the grandest lie of all.
Mankind is brutish, territorial, savage, warmongering, tribal, carnally dictated, herd-like and parasitic, I feel no need to flood you with examples to solidify my point on any of those designations.
Yes we are capable of critical thinking and rationale, but how many of us apply those gifts regularly? How many of us eat emotionally, take sides instinctively and choose life partners based on feel rather than logic?


"When a man walks up to a girl in a bar, anything he says is just him trying not to say," Hi, I wanna sleep with you."."   - Louis C.K.


This quote may be crude and a tad unpleasant, but it is certainly the purest form of truth. I defy any man reading this to pipe up and disagree with the statement, I dare you to lie to both of us and say that is not the truth. This is after all why men frequent bars in the first place, women go to dance and men go to prey on drunk women who have dulled their senses and could now be dumb enough to sleep with them.
Both desires come from our primal selves and look at all the many pomp and frills we tack onto it in order to be okay with what it is.
 We can deny our internal beasts all we like but the need, that burning urge to feed is ever present.
Civility be damned when the blood starts flowing south of the brain, all that matters is the want.


"With every day, and from both sides of my intelligence, the moral and the intellectual, I thus drew steadily nearer to the truth, by whose partial discovery I have been doomed to such a dreadful shipwreck: that man is not truly one, but truly two."  - Robert Louis Stevenson


Stevenson's unquestioned masterpiece, The strange case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is clearly the most profound example of pondering over the dual psyche man has ingrained into himself.
 Perhaps we struggle so mightily because we approach the matter with the improper method.
You can no more quell one side of yourself entirely than you can wish one of your own thumbs to invert back into your body and disappear.
Only when balance is struck can duality be found, and the path to true evolution can be uncovered.

 I have long since known myself to be a steadfast intellectual who adores the art of conversation and leaps at any opportunity for intelligent debate and a cerebral challenge. I adore cinema as the lost art form that it is, I have a profound mental connection to the written words of scribes  present and past, I approach every situation as practically and objectively logical as I can muster.


 However, I also know I am a fiery animal at my core, I burn intensely for the those I care for and will think nothing of scorching the earth with anyone who poses harm to those I hold close. I order my steaks bloody raw and red as possible, I embrace my aggression rather than pacify it and I never ignore the urge to howl at the moon when she is full and filled with luminous glory.
I am both man and monster, poet and primate, cerebralist intellectual and savage instinctivist.
I in no way pretend to be more evolved, and yet I have found peace within myself.


Is balance too much to hope for?
 Are we relegated to one or the other?
Do we choose the exciting and passionate yet dangerous and unpredictable path guided by instinct?
Do we elect to follow the stable and dependable yet dreadfully unimaginative and ultimately sterile path of the logical?
 Is it possible to balance both, to find a middle road?
Do you want happiness or do you want substance at the end of your life?
It sure would be nice to have the answers to these questions, wouldn't it?
 But then again, if somebody who is so traditionally unbalanced like myself can find internal harmony with both sides, it should be really damn easy for someone such as yourself, right?